cheddar & sour cream ruffles w/ a cold bottle of dr pepper = deliciousness

it’s so scary how fucked up my thoughts are ;o shit no one wonder no one likes me , i dont like myself.lol.

i had a nice birthday .i got; to eat 2 bomb ass ice cream cakes , lasagna  & watched the mayweather-cotto  fight with my family . & i met my baby cousin Sophia :D & the other day i saw my cousin azalea. i swear she gets cuter every time i see her! & oh yeah i got to spend some Quality time with my other baby cousin roman & damn i swear he’s an advanced baby ! he’s so small & can already stand on his own+ he crawls so fast,  it’s so cute lol.   i got a lot of love this year for my birthday , which was surprising to me because this past few years i haven’t exactly been the most pleasant person to be around ,to say the least.  i am truly grateful to have such  a  beautiful , loving family who still acknowledges me despite how horrible of a person i’ve become. & that makes me feel like even more of a burden cuz my family’s so fun, happy & cheerful & im the exact opposite x_x i really do hope that one day i go back to the kind , happy , & lovable person i once was so i don’t have to wallow in my own self pity & feel so guilty for being such a shitty person ………… anyways , i had a great b-day , but the sad part is my uncle was  too sick to enjoy all the festivities that have been going on ;’[   i hope he feels better soon  …… oh yeah my lakers lost on my bday (may 8) just like last year >:’[…….. i swear life is like a slope : you start at the bottom &work your way to the top & once your reach the peak you fall down so fucking hard  &gotta start over again …  it’s like one good thing happens  & shortly after 5 bad things happen that make you forget about the good thing. fuck ! there i go again feeling sorry for myself when there are millions suffering way worse than me ,which makes me even more sad … oh life , why must you be so tragic , gruesome , painful , miserable & traumatic ?!!!!!!?!?!?!?!?